Divorce And Grief Counseling Kansas City; Therapist Expounds On The Stages Of Grief After Divorce

By Sharon Long


Divorce leaves one grieving of ambiguous loss. This brings about an intense feeling of grief, similar to what one feels after the death of a loved one. Regardless of the turn of events that lead to the end of your marriage, the parties involved are bound to experience loss in a very exceptional way. You can expect to grieve during divorce and even after your marriage is dissolved. If you require divorce and grief counseling Kansas City has a reliable number of proficient counselors to offer.

Once you are served with the divorce papers, the first phase you will fall into is denial. You may assume that your partner is acting out and is possibly not serious about the decision. The shock may even leave you thinking that what happened did not happen at all. The duration of the denial phase will depend on whether or not you saw a divorce coming.

Once you are through with the denial phase, you now fall into a chapter of pain and anxiety. At this point, you could begin worrying about what your life will be like without the emotional and financial support of your partner. You may also experience psychological and even physical pain because of all the changes that will take place and how they will affect not only you, but also your kids. Fortunately, it is the pain that enables you to pick yourself up and decide on the best way forward.

The phase that follows is the anger stage. At this point, just about everything will make you angry including the warning signs you saw before marriage and ignored. You will also be angry about the frustrations you silently went through during marriage. Most couples will also be angry that their mess will affect their children.

It is natural for someone to at this point decide to save the dying marriage. This is known as the bargaining phase and it involves giving promises and promising change. Because of all the desperation, you are likely to end up giving unrealistic promises. Unfortunately, bargaining does not always work and you will need to again focus on your future.

The guilt phase then kicks in and this where you think about all the things you would have done different. In some cases, the turn of events can be blamed on both spouses. You should therefore take it easy on yourself to get rid of that feeling of carrying around a hundred pounds wrapped around your ankles. Any therapist will tell you for free that you need to get over the guilty feeling for you to move on.

Unfortunately the depression stage is almost inevitable. You are likely to have a void and filling it will not be a simple thing to do. This is more so the case if you were married for years and had a profound love for your spouse. It is during this phase that most people decide to seek counseling.

Life does not come to a halt simply because one has been divorced. The body creates a coping mechanism and it is true that time is a healer. That said, the final stage is acceptance where an individual embraces the past and focuses on the future. Getting to this phase is not easy and seeking reliable counseling would be crucial.




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